Caprica! The Musical

Well I must admit. I am confused and bitter as to the direction that Caprica has taken. I, like many viewers, am shocked and betrayed to discover that the promise of a bold new musical has been instead swapped out for terse, understated, emotionally driven human drama. Where are the flashy dance numbers? The glamorous songs and the glitzy costumes? Not to mention not a laser blast in sight!  Oh sure, we were teased with the promise of a musical number when “Mysteries” showed up, but his appearance was all too brief (and devoid of a true song and dance number).

After this press release from SyFy, I, like many other cylons, was expecting something far different:

Fame hungry Tinnie Heart dreams of a life on the Caprican stage, and spends her nights jazzing it up in the bright lights of Caprica City, continually hoping that she’ll find her lucky break, and be shot into pre-Cylon War stardom. Fleeing the tyranny of her boring husband Amos, and in awe of seductive club singer Number Six (who is subsequantly arrested for the murder of her husband and sister – after discovering their affair), Tinnie meets Gaius Baltar, a man who convinces her he can ‘make her showbiz career take off’. However after Tinnie has undergone the ‘casting couch’ treatment, and Gaius has had his wicked way with her, he reveals that he has no more connections in showbusiness than she does. This is the final straw for Tinnie, and her constant anger at rejection explodes. She shoots Gaius Baltar and kills him. Upon discovering her infidelity, TInnie’s husband Amos refuses to take the blame for the murder and Tinnie is sent to jail, pending “boxing”. In jail she finally meets tabloid darling Number Six, currently receiving huge media attention for the double murder she committed earlier in the tale. Sharing the clink with Six, are a collection of other sly cylon females, all awaiting trial for the murders of their own partners. Six is aloof to Tinnie, however the prison Warden Mrs Morton offers Tinnie the opportunity of representation by slick Caprica lawyer Joseph Adama. Joseph is more a showbiz/mafia P. R agent than a legal lawyer and minipulates the tabloids into thinking Tinnie is no more than an innocent ‘good time cylon’ who took the wrong path, than a scheming murderess. The tabloids go crazy for the new girl on the cell block, and Tinnie finally becomes a star. However due to Tinnie’s new found fame, Six is forgotten about. She is forced to approach Tinnie with an offer of a part in her New Cap City act (filling the gap left by her murdered sister), but Tinnie turns down her offer flat, thinking she needs no support in topping the bill. However, just as Six’s star fell, so does Tinnie’s, when Go-to-hell Daggit arrives at the jail on a multiple murder charge. The press forget Tinnie and now she and Six are in the same boat. With one more trick up her sleave TInnie manages to bring the media attention back onto her, and her day in court arrives. Adama is now ready to play the ultimate showman!

What happened Syfy? Where is the vision? Where is the promise of ‘exciting dance numbers’ and Caprican showmanship? The comic routines? The laser guns?

Seriously, this viewer is going to give this show one – maybe two – more seasons to shape up.

After that I’m going back to “Glee”.

By your command.

One thought on “Caprica! The Musical

  1. All a part of The Plan, brothers and sisters! You will come to understand as the Caprican stages burn…

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